The Cure to Nice Guy Syndrome

Nice Guy Syndrome is a highly prevalent mental illness, and as yet completely unrecognised by the authorities in psychological science. So it’s up to amateurs like me to provide support. While every Nice Guy presents with different symptoms and issues, and needs a different treatment plan from others to recover, there are some general recovery principles that have worked well Read More

Nice Guy Narcissism: The hidden selfish motives behind people pleasing

Nice Guys and people pleasers give the appearance of being self-sacrificing, altruistic, and intensely concerned with the wellbeing of others. It’s hard to imagine that they’re motives are complete selfish and that they don’t really care about other people. Especially because they see themselves as giving people as well. But as a recovering Nice Guy and coach, I can confirm Read More

Nice Guys with an Avoidant Attachment Style

Most of the Nice Guys I’ve worked with show evidence of primarily having an Avoidant Attachment Style (though some are Anxious and none are Secure). This leads to difficulties in creating deep connections, expressing darker emotions, and generally being honest and open. In this video, we’ll explore the connection between Nice Guy Syndrome and Avoidant Attachment, and talk about how Read More

What causes someone to become a Nice Guy?

Check out the full Nice Guy Syndrome Recovery & Social Confidence Building course here: Or email to inquire about more personal support or coaching. Nice Guy Syndrome – sometimes known as People Pleasing Syndrome – is becoming widely known these days as a serious mental disorder affecting many men, possibly even a majority. By why is it that Read More

Why You Need to Stop People Pleasing Right Now!

Check out the full Nice Guy Syndrome Recovery & Social Confidence Building course here: Or email me for more support This video is an excerpt from the above-mentioned online course. Far too often, people pleasing is dismissed as a superficial habit that shouldn’t be taken too seriously. And yet, for nice guys and people pleasers, this behaviour hides Read More

Why people pleasers struggle to recover from illness

I’m currently trying to heal from “long” Covid, and one of my biggest challenges is that I can’t let myself recover. I keep getting up to do shit, trying to be a loving supportive husband and father. And every time I do something, I delay my recovery. I can feel it. I get sicker again. I add another few days Read More

The “Strong Independent Person” is a myth

One thing that nice guys and people pleasers have in common is they like to think of themselves as “independent”. They take pride in this independence, in being self-sufficient. This can be a response to childhood trauma. Relying on others harmed us considerably, so we came to the conclusion that it’s just safer to do it all ourselves. This is Read More

Why Nice Guys are reluctant to show attraction and interest

For much of my early years, I had a strange reluctance to give praise and compliments and show interest in people, beyond sort of vague non-committal and judgmental praise. I also felt resistant to receiving affection. It took me a long time to realize why I had this problem, and it’s because showing interest is the precursor to intimacy. Like Read More

Cure Nice Guy Syndrome by being unpleasant

When I started investigating how I was unable to express emotions as a Nice Guy (alexithymia), I observed a theme. All the emotions that could be described with the word “dis-” in the front of it are the ones that I most struggled to express, e.g. disagreement dislike disinterest disgust distrust disappointment All the disses were the hardest ones for Read More

What is Nice Guy Syndrome?

The term Nice Guy Syndrome was first coined by Dr Robert Glover in his book No More Mr Nice Guy. While it’s not an official mental illness or disorder in the DSM, it’s becoming widely recognized as a measurable and consistent issue for modern men. It’s also occasionally referred to as People Pleasing Syndrome, though this extends to women as Read More

The Life Story of A Classic Nice Guy

I’ve been coaching Nice Guys for 10 years now. One of the reasons that they’re my favourite type of client is because I am one of them. Or was, at least. In this video livestream, I shared my journey into and out of Nice Guy Syndrome. I cover what triggered my initial people pleasing as a child, how that developed Read More

The Nice Guy reaction to being a Disappointment

I was once a camp counselor at an American camp, and I was looking after a bunk full of 13 year old boys. My first night there, they were really rowdy until late at night, and I got in trouble for it as their managing counselor. My boss Alvarez came up to me in the morning and said, “I’m really Read More


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