Forgive yourself for being manipulated

If you’ve ever been in a manipulative relationship, or been conned, bullied, or abused, then you know the real damage done is your loss of self trust. There’s something about getting “got” – about being successfully manipulated by others – that makes you doubt yourself. I think one of the main reasons people are so hurt by being cheated on Read More

How to escape from a Narcissist

I had a dude asked me about how to deal with ending a relationship with a narcissist. In this case I think it’s somebody he works with. He was talking about how they engage “proxies” – other people – in the kind of circle of targeting and bullying. It feels like you’re up against this crowd. How should you deal Read More

Watch out for this subtle gaslighting tactic

A client of mine had a confrontation with a difficult family member the other day. It seemed like it was going reasonably well. And then this family member said, “Hey, maybe you should try anti-depressants. I’ve been using them. They’re really good for me. Maybe they’d help you too.” And it seemed like a kind of connecting, genuine, caring thing Read More

Stop manipulation with The Agreement Frame technique

One of my clients has a difficult manipulative boss. My client wants to confront this boss about changing his role, and he knows that his boss is going to use a couple of manipulation techniques. One thing the boss is going to do is offer all these false promises of change to quell his aggravations. This is the “delay tactic”, Read More

How to know if someone is an honest person

In one of my earlier pieces, I mentioned how I can test to see if people are honest with me. Somebody wrote in asking how I do that. The long story is I do a great big deductive process. I don’t use FBI body language measuring techniques or anything like that. Instead, I use logic and evidence to calculate likelihoods. Read More

Why Andrew Tate fans get so defensive

Here’s a little trick question you can ask to figure out if you or someone else is being manipulated. Do you defend the potentially manipulative person? You can see this with Andrew Tate fans. A lot of people will defend Andrew Tate, and yet he clearly doesn’t need to be defended. For all his faults, he’s clearly not a coward Read More

[Short] I got manipulated by the splitting technique!

Get your Daily Dose of Integrity with my FREE newsletter here: Without revealing too many personal details, I admit that I recently fell victim to something called “splitting”. Splitting is a manipulative behaviour, often favoured by people with severe versions of Borderline and Narcissistic Personality Disorders, where you literally split people against each other. Through gossip, innuendo, and sometimes Read More

[Short] Dealing with manipulators who make false accusations

Get your Daily Dose of Integrity with my FREE newsletter here: One classic tactic that manipulators use is accusations, making unfair accusations. It’s a great distraction. When you’re accusing someone of something or where you’re challenging them on their behavior, they’ll make a big accusation against you. A scary one and it’s often so offensive or so threatening that Read More


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