People pleasing behavior vs genuine kindness

Sometimes it can be a little confusing to know the difference between people pleasing and just being a genuinely generous, kind, and helpful person. Often the behaviors are exactly the same. The key is the difference in intention. Sometimes it’s primary and sometimes it’s secondary, but with people pleasers there’s always an intention to get certain benefits for themselves; namely Read More

People Pleasing Syndrome VS Nice Guy Syndrome

While people pleasing is often (but not always) a symptom of Nice Guy Syndrome, it’s worth noting that People Pleasing Syndrome – or sociotrophy – is a condition all on its own. Defined by obsession with making people happy, and sacrificing all other areas of life to keep your relationships comfortable, People Pleasing Syndrome is possibly one of the most Read More

Does people pleasing actually please people?

There’s a kind of horrible truth that people pleasers and nice guys like to overlook, and it’s this: When somebody else does it to you, it’s obvious and you hate it. Have you noticed that? My clients often go through a phase of hating other people pleasers, because once they can see it for what it is, they feel disgusted Read More

[Short] A hidden symptom of people pleasing syndrome

One of the hidden manifestations of the people-pleasing syndrome is that you constantly feel like you’re choosing between options. Often it’s the false dichotomy of A vs B. Other times it can feel like a broad or even overwhelming range of options. Regardless, you’ll feel like most of your decisions are a choice between available options. They’ve already been laid Read More

[Short] The weird reaction people pleasers have when someone they helped succeeds

Join The Integrity Army for free group coaching here Have you ever noticed yourself doing a weird thing that I used to do a lot which is you’ll be helping someone encouraging them, supporting them, giving them advice, maybe someone like a partner, someone close to you, and then they actually finally start doing something about it and making Read More

Why people pleasers struggle to say No

The hallmark of a classic people pleaser is their inability to say No to requests and demands. Self-sacrifice, leading to burnout, is a very common experience for people pleasers. They will constantly prioritize other people’s needs and wants over their own, even when the other people haven’t specifically asked for them to. In fact, it’s not unusual to see a Read More

What is a People Pleaser?

I’ve been coaching People Pleasers since 2013, and I am a People Pleaser in recovery myself (sometimes I referred to myself as a Nice Guy). I’ve read everything there is to read on the subject, and there are some common themes plus some variations and differences. First, there is a difference between people pleasing (a type of behavior) and People Read More

[Short] Why Nice Guys treat their loved ones worse than strangers

Wanna escape Nice Guy Syndrome and become a confident authentic man? Take my social confidence quiz now to receive free advanced content: Comment below with your opinions on this! There’s a harsh little truth about nice guys and people pleasers that they have to face, and that is, more often than not, they’re nicer to complete strangers than they Read More

How to stop being a people pleaser

What is a People Pleaser? While often mistaken for being genuinely generous, kind, and helpful, People Pleasers (those with People Pleasing Syndrome) are not quite as authentic as they seem. A People Pleaser is a person who prioritizes helping others, making other people happy, and being seen as a good person, not just because it’s the right thing to do Read More

[Short] The “God Complex” delusion that People Pleasers have but can’t see

If you enjoyed this video, check out more of my work, links, posts and contact details – including my FREE group coaching, here:   There’s a kind of narcissism in Nice Guys and people pleasers that we’re very reluctant to admit to ourselves. And I’ve called it, the Inept God Complex. So the god complex is where you think your grandiose, Read More

[Short] People Pleasing vs Genuine Giving

Want FREE ACCESS to my $200 Nice Guy Recovery online training course? Just fill out this quick 5min survey and I’ll send you access immediately!     A lot of People Pleasers pride themselves on being generous and giving. The simple fact is of course that they’re not really. Everything comes with a condition. Everything is designed to manipulate people into giving the Read More

Why do People Pleasers get disrespected? Its because they SOUND weak!

If you enjoyed this video, check out more of my work, links, posts and contact details – including my FREE group coaching, here:   People pleasers have an unfortunate habit of presenting themselves weakly. They lack assertiveness training and therefore have bad body language, posture and voice tone. This makes people disrespect them, partly because they don’t respect themselves! In this Read More


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