You’re talking to someone. You want it to go well. You’re trying your best. But then it happens… You can’t think of what to say next. The silence grows… and grows… and you start to panic, wracking your brains for something, ANYTHING, good to say. Then you either blurt out something meaningless and fake, immediately disconnecting and killing the rapport. Read More

✅ Join the Brojo community on Skool to build your confidence and relationships   Why Compliments Make You Uncomfortable (And How to Finally Accept Them) For a lot of people — especially nice guys and people-pleasers — receiving a compliment is one of the most uncomfortable social situations imaginable.It sounds ridiculous when you say it out loud. You want people Read More

When I say speaking your mind, I mean speaking about that one thing in your mind that you’re not speaking about. I’ll give you an example to make sense of this. Let’s say I go up to somebody at a party—and I’m totally making this up off the top of my head, which is actually an example of what I’m Read More

People who have an agenda about me being harmed—I won’t answer any of their questions. I won’t respond to any of their accusations. I won’t even acknowledge that they’re really saying anything at all when they’re not staying on topic. Then, I’ll just plow through like a broken clock. I’ll keep repeating myself, and the thing I usually repeat is: Read More

Daily Dose of Integrity If you felt that you were on the winning side and you’re shocked by the loss (or you just can’t understand it, you think the other side is stupid or cruel), you’ve probably been manipulated by feedback that made you think you were changing minds. In reality, what you’re really seeing is people who already agreed Read More

Daily Dose of Integrity If you acknowledge people and say: “Look, even though you’re all the way over there on the other side of the spectrum, I know you’ve got your reasons for being there. I know you found your way to those beliefs in a similar way I found my way to mine—and we’re both human. Actually, a lot Read More

The Pattern I’ve Seen As a coach, I cross paths with many people who suffer from various mental health issues. And one of the most unfortunate symptoms of these issues is a lack of awareness as to how it’s affecting you socially. More specifically, I often see people who believe they are the victim of others, when in reality the Read More

There’s something I want you to pay attention to. I want you to notice that when someone is not being completely real with you, you’re aware of it. Let’s say you ask them if they want to come to your party, and they say, “Oh, I’m a bit busy that night, I might have some stuff on”, and you just Read More

A client of mine was really frustrated the other day. He was trying to leave work to spend time with his son, and he was – as he put it – “dragged” into a conversation he didn’t want to have with a coworker who asked him a question on the way out the door. As we explored it, I kept Read More

Daily Dose of Integrity This one’s for all the women out there who are in relationships with men. I don’t know what kind of Disney-princess conditioning you were subjected to when you were growing up, but too many of you think it’s natural and normal to be coy, indirect and vague, hinting to get what you want from your partner. Read More

Got a question from a Brojo member: What do we do when we know someone’s lying to us? So I’ll admit, despite studying honesty for nearly 20 years and working with dishonest criminal offenders for nearly 7 years, I still can’t always tell when someone is lying, and sometimes I think someone is lying when they’re not. I’ve learned that Read More

There’s a question I get asked quite often by my clients, which is: “How do you deal with people who are indirect?” How do you deal with people who ask for what they want in subtle, hidden, vague, discreet ways that you have to interpret like a code to figure out what they’re saying? I’m sure you know the type Read More