The number one trigger for most of your man’s terrible behaviours: sexual shame. Guaranteed, if I work with him for 6 months, chances are it’ll be sexual shame that ends up being at the core of all of his issues.

You’ve got men who basically think it’s wrong to want sex, let alone to initiate it.

There are plenty of exceptions—lots of guys who don’t have this problem—but if you’re a normal, socially active woman, you’ve been surrounded by these guys your entire life.

They’re your friends, your orbiters, the guys you go into a relationship with, and they are really passive.

They don’t stand up for themselves, they don’t stand up to you.

You end up squashing them under your thumb and you don’t know why, you don’t know how you end up playing the masculine role in the relationship, and they just sort of sit back.

The fear of rejection is at the heart of this.

You’ve got to understand that the guy is terrified of being rejected, overcome with anxiety about it—even with someone he’s already with.

When I used to be with a woman in a relationship, if one night she said, “Oh, I don’t feel like sex tonight,” I assumed that the relationship was over.

That’s how bad I thought it was.

If she didn’t text me back right away, I’d start panicking.

It’s just this idea that as soon as someone doesn’t want me, there’s this massive consequence, and that I’m a bad person. It’s all being confirmed, a lot of guys think this way.

To dive deeper into this topic, check out the original video here: