What’s the point in worrying?

I noticed something with a client of mine (and in my own life) about worrying, and that is if I’m worrying about something then I must have a deeper belief that worrying is somehow a good idea, that it’s helpful.

I’ve realized working with clients that so many people have this belief because they make no attempt to challenge their impulse to worry.

Worrying is where you anticipate potential negative scenarios (negative compared to what you hope will happen), and ruminate on the What if? question incessantly in your imagination.

People are worried all the time about important things, so when they successfully complete important tasks they assume worrying must have somehow been helpful because it’s always there whenever they’re successful.

They credit worrying with their success simply because it correlates highly. It’s like how people think yelling is a normal part of a relationship simply because it often happens in their relationships.

They don’t stop to think about the other What if? questions.

What if the worrying is actually slowing me down?

What if I could complete important tasks without worrying?

What if worrying doesn’t serve any useful purpose?!

What if worrying is actually an extra burden I choose to carry with me?

I want you to stop and ask yourself a question: When is the last time worrying made something go better than not worrying would have done?

If you can plan, solve a problem, and achieve a goal while focusing on what’s going well and only dealing with genuine obstacles that come up, what extra benefit does worrying about stuff that hasn’t happened serve?

One Response

  1. Make a deal with your worry, say, “If that does happen, we’ll deal with it then, so let’s keep moving forward”

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