You don’t need to say, “I’m angry with you.”

You can say something like, “I’ve got a lot of tension in my upper chest after you said that.”

You’re actually portraying yourself a lot more accurately. It may feel like you’re saying, “I’m out of control,” if you say, “I feel angry,” but if you just say, “I feel tension in my fists; they keep clenching,” that’s not saying you’re out of control. If anything, you’re probably controlling yourself.

So, step one is to learn to express it in neutral, descriptive language, whether to yourself or to others. The next step is to figure out what to do with it.

One way to look at it is that all of your emotions are both indicators and energy.

What I mean is, they’re both signs of what’s going on for you right now, and they’re a source of fuel for some type of activity.

Basically, anger is good for things like determination, courage, and risk-taking.

It’s the thing that gets you over the line when fear has been holding you back.

They’re all useful; you just have to work with what you’ve got.

There’s no point trying to do something aggressive and courageous when you’re feeling sad, right?

You need to do something that’s related to sadness, like creating some art or writing in your journal. Those are good sadness activities, and it doesn’t necessarily have to be the commonly accepted way of dealing with it.

To dive deeper into this topic, check out the original video here: