The Value of Responsibility

Responsibility is the father of all the masculine values.

In this video we explore what Responsibility is, as a value, and what it means to live by it consistently.



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Full transcript (unedited)

Welcome back to the brojo Value series with me, Dan Munro. And today we’re going to be talking about the value of responsibility. And the broader philosophy, this is the father of all the masculine values. Because until you live by this value, you can live by any of them, you can have integrity until you take responsibility for your life. So this one’s kind of an important one, and that what does it mean? I think one of the best descriptions I’ve had or heard off for this was from my former coach Jacob Sokol. And that is the difference between being a victim or being a creator, a victim life happens to them, they are better around like a ship in a storm, destroyed by the waves of life. And a creator serves those waves, a creator steers the ship as best they can in that storm, knowing that it’s up to them to steer the ship. Now I want to talk about the difference between blame and responsibility. This is a key aspect to understand this value. Blame is when you look backwards to try and find a cause and effect relationship. You say, Why did this happen? Who’s responsible for it? When you’re using the word responsible, but you’re not living by the value of it, you’re looking for cause and effect, you’re looking to pin the effect on a cause, say, there’s that person’s fault or that person’s fault, or even it’s my fault. Responsibility doesn’t give a shit, why something’s happening. It just deals with it. So we’re blamed goes, who did this responsibility goes, I’d better do something about it. And that’s what living by the value of responsibility is, instead of trying to wait for somebody else to take action, you take action, responsibility versus acceptance, this is an important distinction to make as well. Acceptance, in my opinion, is the mother of all feminine values. And these two are in a partnership together because we are responsibility ends, acceptance begins. So responsibility is taking ownership that everything that you can influence and control. And acceptance is letting go of all things you can’t you see how these two values work together. So responsibility means going, Hey, this is for me to deal with these parts of my life. And here’s how I’m going to do that. Whereas acceptance goes, this is for somebody else to deal with. This is outside of my scope, I’m going to let it go. Responsibilities own owning who you are, warts and all. Everything about you never apologizing for being a human. All those things that you call weaknesses, and faults and failures, they’re just part of who you are. That’s the part of your past. They’re part of your current makeup. They’re part of your permanent personality, whatever, they’re part of you. That doesn’t mean that to stay that way, responsibility is asking the question, What am I going to do about it. But the key is also to own it, that even if your parents fucked you up, you’re now fucked up, you have to own this, you have to do something about it. Even if somebody else bullied you, right to harmed you in some way. While it might have been them, if you’re gonna give blaming, they did it to you. It’s your job to deal with it. That’s it. It’s your job to heal, recover, grow and prove from the experience, make the most of it. That’s what responsibility is sponsibility goes, it doesn’t matter what happened to me. What matters is what I do about it. It’s leadership, and in particular, two parts of leadership owning, initiating and reaction. So you’re the one who looks at a situation where a group of people going, who’s going to do something about it, responsibility is the person who goes, You know what, I’ll do something about it. At least to get started, I’ll initiate I’ll go first. If I like someone, I’ll tell them I like them first, rather than waiting to see a sign that they like me. If I want a job, I’ll apply for it. If I want something, I’ll go for it. That’s what leadership is initiating, going first without permission, and responsibilities focusing on your reaction. You can’t control what happens to you. But you do have a lot of influence over what you do next. You cannot stop someone yelling at you, but you choose whether or not you’re going to yell back. You cannot stop someone beating you up. But you can to choose whether or not you’re going to learn martial arts to better prepare yourself next time. These acts of responsibility while blame is sitting around going Why did this happen to me? So in order to sum this up, if you’re looking to turn responsibility into an act of a way of living head on Engaging the value is to answer the question What am I going to do about it and following through on that with action that is living by the value of responsibility hope that was helpful and I’ll see you next time for the remainder of the Value series cheers

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