Let’s talk about Nice Guy codependency.

My clients — Nice Guys — typically take on the role of caretaker or fixer in their relationships.

They’re the hero who comes in to save the day.

They’re the ones who are needed, and they’re generally attracted to people who struggle to manage their own emotions or lives in a way that allows the fixer to slot themselves in as a necessary support person.

This might not be immediately apparent during the dating phase — it gradually develops over time as the Nice Guy builds a connection with his partner.

At the start, he might actually set some boundaries and be a bit more independent.

But as time goes on, he starts apologizing more, offering advice, fixing emotions, and so on.

While the Nice Guy thrives on being helpful in a practical way — like managing finances or being a handyman — where he really thrives is in emotional control.

He likes to play the pseudo-therapist, managing his partner’s emotions for her.

Nice Guy Syndrome is all about control — controlling the emotions of others so he can feel comfortable, secure, and safe in the relationship.

From the outside, it may appear that the Nice Guy is the strong one — stoic, calm, the problem solver — and his partner is the wild, chaotic one who needs the support system. And he engineers it this way.

But the truth is, he’s just as fucked up as she is.

To dive deeper into this topic, check out the original video here: