Many people think that their emotions are the problem.

See, emotions aren’t the problem.

Confident people aren’t suppressing their emotions—it’s how you perceive and react to emotions that determines your quality of life.

A confident person doesn’t react quickly and thoughtlessly to their feelings, but they don’t suppress them either. They harness them like energy and use them to engage in behaviour that improves their life.

Emotions are life itself, but if you’re a victim to them, you’ll drown in them. It’s like surfing. The waves are necessary for surfing—if you want a good surf, you need big waves. But if you don’t know how to surf and lack the confidence to ride the wave, you’ll get pulled under and dragged along the coral. So, you start to think waves are bad, but it’s really about what you do with them.

This is how emotions are.

Most people seem to go through a roller-coaster of suppressing emotions and then exploding. They either hold them back like a tea kettle boiling over, while drowning in emotion and getting dragged across the coral reef, or they let them take over.

You’ve got to learn to surf your emotions.

Whenever a feeling comes up, ask yourself: what’s the best way to use this energy? What’s the healthiest decision I can make while feeling this way?

Every feeling serves a helpful purpose if you know how to use it. Anger, sadness, confusion, stress, depression—these can all serve a purpose.

You don’t have to suppress them, and you don’t have to let them wash over you and drown you. Just ask yourself: how do I make the most of this feeling?

To dive deeper into this topic, check out the original video here: