[Short] The Big Lie you tell yourself that stops you being more confident

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I ask almost anyone if they’re an honest person and they’ll say, “Pretty much!” They’ll say, basically, I’m an honest person, most if not all of the time. And yet, we know this isn’t true. So why does everyone believe this? They believe it because being honest is good and people like to see themselves as the hero of the story, they like to see themselves as a good person. I’ve worked with brutal criminals that still think of themselves as a good person. So it’s very hard to tell yourself, I’m a good person, if you also have to tell yourself, I’m a fucking liar who pretends and manipulates all the time. So you have to tell yourself this big convoluted story about how what you do isn’t really dishonesty. It’s necessary or it’s helpful or something, so it doesn’t really count as dishonesty. Therefore, I’m an honest person. And that’s the main lie that everyone tells. And you can’t deal with all the other dishonesty until you face the truth about how much you lie to yourself about how honest you are.

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