Watch the video above, or read the transcript below
At BROJO, we’ve been talking a lot about the views, perspectives and beliefs that men have about woman, and how this affects our interactions and our relationships. We’ve identified that many, if not most men, have at least a few very unhelpful beliefs that get in the way of them creating loving and meaningful connections with women.
When it comes to finding out where some of these unhelpful beliefs come from, we need look no further than the Red Pill philosophy. I don’t think any other philosophy or community has put more effort into trying to categorize and understand women as a group than Red Pill has.
For those of you who aren’t already familiar with Red Pill, it’s essentially a loosely formed self-development community that shares a coherent philosophy (though without any one main source) based on the idea of ‘taking the red pill’, derived from the movie The Matrix. The red pill symbolises the brutal truth and knowledge of the world, and Red Pill teaches how to function as a man with that truth. And a dedicated and well fleshed-out subsection of this philosophy is the ‘truth’ about women.
Today, we’re going to be reviewing a guy named Rollo Tomassi. He’s considered one of the forefathers of the Red Pill movement, particularly the Red Pill’s view of women, dating, and relationships. His book and blog, both titled The Rational Male, has been treated almost like a Bible in the Red Pill community.
Below are the 9 Iron Rules that he came up with to describe how a man should behave if he wishes to have a good life, particularly in relation to women, dating and relationships.
Check out the video above for more.
Thank you for watching. If you don’t hate me too much, please subscribe to my YouTube channel. Comment below with your thoughts and feelings. I’m open to all feedback. I’m here to learn.
And if any of you have read/watched this and started to realize that maybe your views of woman aren’t actually helping you, that you’re not having loving connections and you don’t find the great confident women out there who make your life better, then maybe you need a different way. Get in touch dan@brojo.org, we can talk about a different way to view women that can actually give you the love life that thought only existed in movies.
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24 Responses
This transcript was painful to read. Very early on it was clear that you never bothered to dig any deeper than the surface. There is an entire book, and you read the first few lines of each chapter. If you would have bothered to read the book, you would have understood the meaning of his rules. By just reading the rules with no context or explanation, you completely misunderstood them. After you read the book, you will be embarrassed by this critique and will most likely remove it from your website. Yes, for the most part you got it that bad.
Noted, thanks for the feedback Chris
I totally agree with Chris’ words. Without more context, these rules can be misunderstood, and this definitely happened here. Rule no 5, for example, refers to birth *control*.
It is clear in reading this article that the writer did not read the book and merely skimmed the points. Therefore, the write up was inaccurate. This book is a gem for any aged male to truly understand how to navigate the world especially with the opposite sex.
Absolutely true. A client asked me to review the 9 rules as a summary, so that’s all I did. I tried to read the book but couldn’t get through it – I was put off by the poor writing skills and the ideas being construed were heading too far down the path of blame for me to continue
I agree with you totally. I, too, have not read the book but I have read enough of Tomassi’s opinions and those of his devoted followers
to have a pretty good idea of his philosophy: assume every woman is a conniving bitch until you learn differently. A repulsive, disgusting approach guaranteed to result in one failed relationship after another as men search for the unattainable, the perfect woman…who doesn’t exist.
Frankly, Tomassi’s barely concealed contempt for women in general
would seem to negate any claim of his understanding the dynamics
of male-female relationships on any but a belligerent, antagonistic basis.
I had another attempt at reading the book. Got about 25% through it and just couldn’t push myself to go further. The conspiracy theories about the feminine sexual imperative; the complete absence of scientific sources to back up the many factual claims he makes (most of which are presented out of context or are outright misrepresented); the insistence on the need for manipulation in dating… I just can’t take any more of it.
I agree with you Dan, I think that this entire movement attracts weak men and sucks them into the idea that all of their problems with women are women’s fault. Its just a place for losers to complain about how life isn’t fair. I’ve noticed sections of them also blame other people for other problems. A red pill guy who went to my college, blamed the Jews for him having no money.
I just think they have the mentality of “Its my bosses fault I got fired” not their own for being an unproductive worker, or “Its all women’s fault I can’t get laid” not their own fault for living a lazy lifestyle (porn, video game addiction, never exercising) or, “Its my teachers fault I got my failed my course” not their own fault for getting drunk every night and not studying.
I have seen them blame women, black people, Jews, gay people and various other groups of people for their failures and pathetic lives.
At this point, I would say that (weather he intended to or not), Tomassi has successfully formed a cult of Neo Nazi’s, yeah, my views of the red pill community have come to that.
Ironically, this review of Tomassi was quite weak on my part. I’ve done a much more robust one here – I think you’ll resonate with it https://theinspirationallifestyle.com/an-open-letter-to-the-red-pill-community/
When I read the book, I actually didn’t place any blame on women in general. Instead I understood more the mistakes I had made in vetting the woman I had been with in a relationship that ended badly. I held myself responsible for my part even though what happened was the type of person She is. The second time I started seeing her, I ignored signs which I had seen as red flags. These were subtle signs but I did get a sense of them but I ignored my instincts. This is a very good book to read, and as long as you are balanced in your outlook you will see what to take from it and when and how to utilise it. However I have to say from my personal experience in different kinds of relationships, from no strings attached to long term relationships, Rollo’s writing seems to be quite true and he understands female nature.
Whether is spelled whether.
In my opinion, the red pill community bad, they target young men who have had an unfortunate experience with a woman and tell them that “all women are like that”. Then they fill their heads with nonsense that can really make them resent all women. I think that Rollo Tomassi is just a loser who has managed to brainwash weak minded people to adopt his ludicrous way of thinking.
The red pill community also seems to blame everyone else for their failures (i.e its all women fault that you can’t get laid), guess who blames other people for their failures, Lazy people.
I think that the red pill community encourages people to be lazy, just blame everything on other people, and fills impressionable young men with insane beliefs.
Dan your excuse of not reading the book fully is rubbish. Its your job as a journalist. I dont even agree with the stuff, but this sort of lazy writing is exactly the problem. More than people espousing views on either side.
Not women are the same, not all men are the same – but the majority of them have some common traits. Sociology works with high numbers, in clinical psychology any individual is a special case.
I don’t want to be with a woman who withhold sex from me – but sleeps with others on the side. And most men with self respect have the same opinion.
You are not so naive to imagine that the girl from your story was honest with the other guy and told him that while building something romantic with him she easily made sex with other(s). The sex is special only for the potential long term partner but is offered for free to others.
Honestly it makes me puke to date such a partner.
And this applies to a man sleeping on the side as well.
If you accept such behavior then I wish you a long term relationship with a woman of this kind. Than you will understand how it is when somebody settles for you, when you are the second option, the backup plan. When you are taken only for your financial assets, for stability and not for being sexually attractive.
Practice what you preach !
Rule number 5 is about CONTRACEPTION, stupid kiddo. Never let women be in charge of contraception….. because you run the risk she forgets the pills “”””by accident””””.
OFC you’d know that if you’d red the book, as you’re supposed to do to make a critique.
I appreciate your thoughtful response.
I think that’s the least a rational guy can do.
The red pill theory is total nonsense. It’s misogynistic and harmful to both men and women.
Also, would you mind posting the recommended authors and titles of the books that you mentioned in the video.
Happy to see you enjoyed the post mate. Here are the references including the authors mentioned
REFERENCES AND CITATIONS
[1] https://theinspirationallifestyle.com/podcast/feminism-is-dead-who-killed-it/
[2] https://www.newstatesman.com/science-tech/internet/2017/02/reddit-the-red-pill-interview-how-misogyny-spreads-online
[3] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1634840/
[4] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK222286/
[5] https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167202289013
[6] https://www.newstatesman.com/science-tech/internet/2017/02/reddit-the-red-pill-interview-how-misogyny-spreads-online
[7] https://archive.thinkprogress.org/no-coincidence-california-synagogue-shooter-john-earnest-posted-about-the-red-pill-movement-aa46b31c01ad/
[8] https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-intersect/wp/2014/05/27/inside-the-manosphere-that-inspired-santa-barbara-shooter-elliot-rodger/
[9] Dr Robert Glover – No More Mr Nice Guy author https://www.drglover.com/coaching-groups/groups-for-men.html
[10] John Wineland – masculinity coach https://www.johnwineland.com/
[11] David Deida – The Way of The Superior Man author https://deida.info/
” Here is my critique of a book I didn’t read.”
You, my friend, are living in the feminine frame. No wonder you can’t muster the strength or discipline to read a book you chose to critique.
This “work”, (and I quoted that because you actually have to do something for it to be considered work) exemplifies lazy, weak, and entitled characteristics; everything a red pilled man tries to steer clear of in his own life. The excuse that it was a friend who wanted a quick critique so I didn’t read it, is just that, an excuse.
I highly recommend reading it all the way through; even study it like you’re going to take an exam, that way you can hopefully exercise the woman living inside you.
true story, a gal I was I really loved was able to bamboozle me really easy.
had I known this stuff at the time I could have easily avoided a huge mess.
She parades herself as a strong/smart /kind woman but given a choice-validates herself with genuine registered sex offenders,rapist, and pathetic dudes pretending to be one percent patch MC bikers.
Another gal, older friend of the above, only dates misogynistic men who pretend to be sensitive. She can’t even see than sensitive types.
I hate Lotharios, PUA’s, misogynist rapist/convicts/thugs – i think they’re puke.
Tomassi seems to be helping me avoid the type of women the who LO Lotharios, PUA’s, misogynist rapist/convicts/thugs
Most of these rules I don’t think apply to me. But maybe that’s because I mastered number 9. I’m the best, yuge, nobody has ever been better, I do it better than anyone, everyone in the history of the country, maybe even the world. Even when I’m wrong, I’m actually right. Therefore, why would I need the rest of these puny man rules? Surely you don’t disagree with number 9? If you do, you’re a girly man and you will be total recalled and won’t be back.
From what I’ve seen, confident people never a) compare themselves to others, or b) try to convince others of their worth. You just did both of those things.
I did read the book from cover to cover. It’s misogynist rubbish. It’s poorly written with many word salads that mean nothing. As a former journalist I find it funny that people love to tell journalists what their job is.
Firstly, I concur with the statement (and fact) that you must read a publication in its entirety to give a truly knowledgeable and informed opinion of its content and merit; without doing so is like watching several 10 second snippets of a series of several movies and behaving like “Rogers & Ebert”.
To be blunt, this approach is both incredibly arrogant and intellectually irresponsible.
Secondly, a main rule of investigative journalism, and really any research into spheres of study that you are not formally educated in, is that you MUST approach them with a completely objective frame of mind. ASSUME you do not know what you’re talking about and the author does, THEN you put it to the scrutiny of your education and knowledge thus far.
You’re preconceived notions, and subjective world views are rooted deeply by your ego investment in them, hence from this discriminatory perspective you do not – from the outset- have the capacity to digest the material purely on its own merit. If this statement was difficult to understand for you, then it precisely proves my point .
Thirdly “redpilled” knowledge is deeply rooted in behavioral psychology, inter-gender/intersexual dynamics, physiology , and evolutionary psychology. These are bonafide, heavily researched, and credible fields of study. Accordingly, the tenets of this sphere of information is rooted in science and facts, not in a “misogynistic” disdain for women by hapless losers who are bitter “incels”, the latter opinion is a shortcut to thinking critically.
Lastly, and just as important (if not MOST ), you must have a quantitative e frame of reference if you are to attempt to force your interpretations onto an ideological or principled teaching, for your opinion to even have a basis of merit.
In layman’s terms, (pun intended) you must be well seasoned and experienced with the many man MANY interactions and sexual encounters with the opposite sex to even know what you’re talking about,yet alone understand a publication like Rollo’s
Personally: I’ve had about 100 women lovers in my life, this didn’t include all encounters of physical intimacy that didn’t end in actual fornication; I’ve also had 5 LTR’s that lasted 3 years and a few that were 6 months to a year; I’ve lived with 3 women in my life ( not including my wives); I both cheated on women and was monogamous; I openly juggled multiple women who KNEW that I did; I’ve been married 3 times and have children from 2 different women.
Currently, I’ve been married for 12 years to a beautiful woman, who is 11 years younger than me. I was 40 and she was 29 when we met. I also have 3 terrific, grounded, NON-promiscuous daughters, whom I’ve taught ALL of this knowledge to, so they can reject the feminist lies and marry well and for long term success.
Approaching the “ redpilled” knowledge as objectively as possible, I applied this information to my lifetime experiences with women.
I can tell you, unequivocally , The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi is dead on balls accurate.
In closing I’d like to say that I believe there’s 3 reasons you couldn’t finish the book.
Firstly, it is a tough read. Between the materials saturated with behavior science and Rollos affinity for verbosity, it’s like a long winded college professor.
Two, you have a highly feminized world view ( most people do and are unaware of it) that your ego investment won’t allow you to absorb. This is common in most people, it allows them to dismiss conflictual ideas and information as “crap” without challenging themselves with scrupulous introspection.
And lastly; quite frankly you’ve not had much luck or enough life experience with women to have a basis to understand it.
That’s ok, but what’s NOT OK is for people like yourself to spout off about information beliefs or spheres of study that you are WOEFULLY uneducated about. Just keep your opinion’s to yourselves and let the big boys handle it.