The problem with rumination isn’t the repetitive thoughts themselves—that’s like having a song stuck in your head.

It’s not really painful unless you believe it, unless you think that a serious thinking process is happening that needs to be concluded.

It’s when you fuse with the thought, as they say in Acceptance and commitment therapy. You zoom in on it, and you become the thought, letting it fill your entire awareness.

Let’s say I have a question in my mind, like: Why did that girl reject me? Was it something I said? Was it the way I dressed? I start asking myself these questions and replaying the rejection over and over in my head, investigating it like a detective trying to find an answer.

Instead of just saying, “Hey, it’s just a song stuck in my head, moving on,” I get stuck in it. However, there’s nothing I need to do about it.

The key is stopping myself from believing that this is a conversation I need to have with myself.

I can’t stop the rumination by will alone, but I can refuse to take it seriously.

This is an art that takes a long time to master because every voice in your head sounds legit.

The root cause of negative thinking or rumination is the belief that thoughts must be taken seriously—that thoughts are truth. If you can realize that’s not true, you’ll start to see ruminative thoughts in a different light.

To dive deeper into this topic, check out the original video here: