It can be a helpful step, in becoming emotionally shameless, to actually stop using labels and start describing the physiological sensation.

Describe what you are feeling, instead of trying to categorize what you’re feeling.

Sadness becomes “pain in my chest, tension under my eyes”.

Anger becomes “heat in the back of my neck and an agitation of my muscles”.

Anxiety just becomes “a sense of nausea in my stomach and activation in my chest”.

When you describe it like that, there’s no “good” or “bad” attached to it.

It’s pure.

It hasn’t been tainted by judgment yet.

When you practice this way of talking, when you don’t use the labels, you can even throw off those people who might judge you.

If you were to say to one of your guy friends, who thinks he’s tough, that you feel offended, he might mock you for it.

However, if you were to say, “My heart started racing when you said that, and I felt this heat in my neck,” you’re not actually saying you’re offended, but you are saying it too.

He might not react the same way because he’s not hearing that trigger word that he himself has shame around and feels he has to mock.

To dive deeper into this topic, check out the original video here: