Don’t give up so easily!

Like pretty much everyone else these days, I’ve taken up Brazilian Jiu Jitsu as a new hobby. I started it while I’m here in New Zealand and am really getting into it.

But when I recently had a look at what options are available for when I get back to Czech Republic, where I spend most of my time, I realized I wouldn’t be able to continue BJJ. I’d have to switch to this other thing called “grappling”, which is almost the same. It just doesn’t have the fancy costume.

As I processed this limitation, I was hit by a massive wave of apathy; a lethargy, a sudden tiredness, as if there was no point in continuing because my preferred option wasn’t available, even though the second best option is actually better for me in the long run (grappling is probably better for real-life self defence).

This is a common symptom of Nice Guy Syndrome. We’re so obsessed with things being perfect and easy and exactly as we expect that we’re completely derailed by having our preferred option taken away… even when the remaining options are better!

This is something you’ve got to watch out for.

Your fear will look for the opportunity to make it seem like your first preference is the only option worth considering, and if it’s unavailable then you should just give up, when actually there’s nearly always second and third best options available.

Learn to make the most of what’s real rather than clinging to what’s imagined.

For more on this topic, check out my podcast episode “Expectations: The Secret to Why You’re Never Satisfied”

One Response

  1. Before you decide that an alternate option is “worse” or “not worth it”, check yourself: have you actually tried it?!

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