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Attracted to a friend? Here’s how to manage it

Ever found yourself romantically or sexually attracted to a friend? What is the “right” thing to do in this awkward situation?

You know, for the longest time, I believed that being friends with someone negates the possibility of a romantic relationship, and that’s because I’d spent so much time in “the friendzone” – a state of being friends with a girl but secretly suffering because I wanted so much more.

This is not a real friendship.

I’ve actually seen since then that many great relationships start as a friendship, if it’s done in a healthy way.

But how do we differentiate between a friendship and the friendzone?

Well, there’s a couple of things. First off, you must be honest about attraction as soon as it occurs. So don’t hold it in, build it up, and wait as you develop a secret crush. Make sure that as soon as you’re attracted to anyone you let them know.

But this must be accompanied by no attachment to outcomes. You don’t ask them on a date. You don’t “make a move” on them. You don’t try to make something happen.

You just show them attraction, let that sit there as a truth, and carry on with the friendship.

If it’s meant to be, it will develop from there because you’ve taken the lead. And if not, it just sits out there as truth without doing any damage.

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One Response

  1. If things get awkward and uncomfortable after that (the person doesn’t accept your attraction), then the friendship may need to come to an end for now

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